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Maybe you loved someone once, a long time ago and that was your one shot at it. Maybe, maybe. Of course, this slightly vague and depressing answer depends entirely on what being single means to you. There are many ways of being alone. A couple of years ago, the Office of National Statistics found Britain to be the loneliness capital of Europe.

What a title to bestow. And still, so many of us find it almost impossible to tell other people that we feel isolated. To admit that we wish for more love and affection than we currently receive seems desperate, a recognition of failure, a bit … pathetic. Yet a yen for the embrace of another person is part of what makes us human. No man is an island — we were never meant to be on our own, and yet modern life often means we increasingly find ourselves facing a ready meal for one.

I suppose this is partly progress. If you are looking for companionship in a strictly non-romantic sense, it can be difficult to know exactly where to start. Walking around the apartment naked while eating our bowl of granola. Explorations of kinks and s of orgasms. We were in a relationship without ever saying we were in one.


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I had to leave though. LA was calling me. He agreed. Our texts were full of jokes and what-ifs. Of reminiscing on our short time together. Of his first admittance that he missed me. And of his lack of understanding of why nobody locked me down. He knew I chose that life. His arrival was in pretty humorous fashion. No return ticket bought his spontaneous nature , no hotel booked, showed up in a giant jeep, and made love to me in my apartment within 5 minutes.

Yup, I missed this son of a gun. Cue a week of hotel hopping, of walking through his home town, of In-N-Out burgers. He had his natural smirk etched on his face. I made the usual jokes about his awful texting consistency how does someone reply within 5 seconds and then 12 hours? But I asked him a question that changed everything for me. I asked what he wanted in a partner and in a relationship. And as he was speaking, I realized that I was the woman he was describing.

I wanted to be the woman he wanted.

41 Things You Should Know About Dating a Loner, Because Being Alone Means We Get To Miss You More

And I was so mad at him for not realizing that the woman he described was sitting 2 feet away from him. As we went back to our hotel, we laid on the couch and I told him I wanted us to give it a shot. I wanted us to try to be something. And we slept that night with my question unanswered. Despite no explicit response, we still walked hand-in-hand. We left to Vegas to paint the town red. He changed my notion of what a relationship could be. Before, I had fallen on the first day. Head over heels. And came to a point where I was okay with our dependence on each other.

But K. To be bigger than I thought I could be. To enjoy my independence. He made me love my body again. He never filled me with false vanity or compliments. He was there when he needed to be. To be loving when he needed to be. To be tough when he needed to be. And to give me the space I needed to find my heart again.

So I bought a one way flight and arrived in NY. Little did I know that as soon as I arrived in NY, he was on his way to the airport himself. Good thing I texted.

Tori Kelly - Never Alone (feat. Kirk Franklin) Instrumental with Lyrics

Hard to contain two spontaneous junkies. But reality hit us. I had just gotten a job in Berlin and K. I wanted to know if he wanted us. If he cared. But it was against his morals to do so. Fighting his own selfish desires to keep me to himself, he wanted me to do what was best for me. So I left to Germany. But on one condition. Sheila Ellison. Kathleen Fox.

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